"Your Guide to Open Heart Surgery"

I wasn't hearing things...I did, in fact, need open heart surgery to repair the aneurysm...gosh, even the word sounded horrible. We learned about aneurysms...usually in the brain though...patient comes in with a blown pupil and an eye that is down and out - OH NO - OCULAR EMERGENCY...but what about an aortic aneurysm...isn't that an emergency?!? The complications of not undergoing surgery were apparent; I was smart enough to know what the outcome would be...aortic dissection and ultimately death...just not what I expected at 930am on the 6th of July.

Dr. Shapiro wanted me to make an appointment with the surgeon...that day....and I thought I would head across the street to the hospital and make the appointment in person. It was only the third time I was ever in Abington Hospital - the first was to visit a friend on the hospital and the second was in the ER. I had no idea where to go...I was looking for the Porter Institute for Valvular Disease. After getting off the elevator I made a left and was met with a huge sign on the check-in desk that said "Dr. V. Paul Addonizio: Best Cardiac Surgeon in the State of Pennsylvania." Hmm...I thought to myself...guess this is the place...

The air smelled of candy...like really sweet candy. The kind you would get at a small town fair - you know those...traveling town fairs, rides that your parents think you shouldn't go on but you still do....those kinds...I was greeted by a really nice lady who offered me some of that candy - I choose the butterscotch, I always liked that flavor. I made an appointment for the 27th of July, but later was informed that Dr. Shapiro wanted me to be seen THAT DAY. The butterscotch lady told me it would be awhile and then she did it....she reached down and grabbed the RED FOLDER..."here is some reading material for you while you wait." I opened up the folder and there it was...in black and white...."Your Guide to Open Heart Surgery."

WOW! Now, just picture this...Beethoven's Fifth playing in the background, soft, but loud enough that you couldn't fall asleep, the sweet smell of candy, a blubbering fish tank attempting to calm your fears so your aneursym doesn't rupture in the surgeon's office and photos...lots of them. Photos of others that had gone before; lives Dr. Addonizio saved...smiles and laughter all over. I sat down not for awhile, but for a HELL OF A LONG TIME...hours seemed like days...and I sat there. Reading and re-reading my open heart surgery guide - reading articles of other individuals who underwent the same procedure I was about to have done...young people, old people, middle-aged people - all smiles and all boasting on the incredible job of Dr. Addonizio...who was this man? Who was the man whose hands I am literally putting my life into?

There was a total of about 2 people in the waiting room...gosh, what was taking so long? I had been texting BKP back and forth...I knew my parents and godparents had arrived, and I was apologizing for taking so long...."so sorry I am taking so long...just waiting to be seen by a cardiac surgeon for open heart surgery...hope to be home soon." BKP was my sounding board through all of this..."i am scared" I wrote - a text back, "don't worry...you are strong and you can get through this." Hmm...I have gotten through a lot of stuff in my life; obstacles, academics, rotations, wack job encounters with people, but this...this was gonna be a tough one...I looked at my phone...I had been there for three hours...I was filled up on butterscoth candies and could see the open heart surgery guide with my eyes closed...then, it happened..."Melissa Trego?"